💘💃 Kāma-vitakka, kāma-chanda, kāma and rāga in general
passages that are particularly important:
MN 14: even though a disciple see with wisdom that sensual pleasures are dangerous and unsatisfying, until they have the pleasure of jhānas, they are still tempted by coarse sensual pleasures.
SN 8.4: Ananda gives main tool kit for dealing with sexual lust
AN
AN 2.61 women die without getting enough sex
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“Dvinnaṃ dhammānaṃ, bhikkhave, atitto appaṭivāno mātugāmo kālaṃ karoti. |
“Mendicants, females die without getting enough of two things. |
Katamesaṃ dvinnaṃ? |
What two? |
Methunasamāpattiyā ca vijāyanassa ca. |
Sexual intercourse and giving birth. |
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AN 5.229 women are frightening and treacherous
Black Snakes (1st) 229. Paṭhamakaṇhasappasutta
“Mendicants, there are these five drawbacks of a black snake. “Pañcime, bhikkhave, ādīnavā kaṇhasappe. What five? Katame pañca? It’s filthy, stinking, cowardly, frightening, and treacherous. Asuci, duggandho, sabhīru, sappaṭibhayo, mittadubbhī. These are the five dangers of a black snake. Ime kho, bhikkhave, pañca ādīnavā kaṇhasappe.
In the same way there are five drawbacks of a female. Evamevaṃ kho, bhikkhave, pañcime ādīnavā mātugāme. What five? Katame pañca? She’s filthy, stinking, cowardly, frightening, and treacherous. Asuci, duggandho, sabhīru, sappaṭibhayo, mittadubbhī. These are the five drawbacks of a female.” Ime kho, bhikkhave, pañca ādīnavā mātugāme”ti.
AN 5.230 women are angry, hostile, venomous
AN 5.230 Black Snakes (2nd) 230. Dutiyakaṇhasappasutta
“Mendicants, there are these five drawbacks of a black snake. “Pañcime, bhikkhave, ādīnavā kaṇhasappe. What five? Katame pañca? It’s angry, hostile, venomous, fork-tongued, and treacherous. Kodhano, upanāhī, ghoraviso, dujjivho, mittadubbhī. These are the five dangers of a black snake. Ime kho, bhikkhave, pañca ādīnavā kaṇhasappe.
In the same way there are five drawbacks of a female. Evamevaṃ kho, bhikkhave, pañcime ādīnavā mātugāme. What five? Katame pañca? She’s angry, hostile, venomous, fork-tongued, and treacherous. Kodhano, upanāhī, ghoraviso, dujjivho, mittadubbhī. This is a female’s venom: Tatridaṃ, bhikkhave, mātugāmassa ghoravisatā— usually she’s very lustful. yebhuyyena, bhikkhave, mātugāmo tibbarāgo. This is a female’s forked tongue: Tatridaṃ, bhikkhave, mātugāmassa dujjivhatā— usually she speaks divisively. yebhuyyena, bhikkhave, mātugāmo pisuṇavāco. This is a female’s treachery: Tatridaṃ, bhikkhave, mātugāmassa mittadubbhitā— usually she’s an adulteress. yebhuyyena, bhikkhave, mātugāmo aticārinī. These are the five drawbacks of a female.” Ime kho, bhikkhave, pañca ādīnavā mātugāme”ti.
AN 8.17 ways a woman binds a man
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ruṇṇena, bhikkhave, itthī purisaṃ bandhati; |
1. (by) crying, monks, (a) woman {binds} man; |
hasitena, bhikkhave, itthī purisaṃ bandhati; |
2. (by) smiling-or-laughing, monks, (a) woman {binds} man; |
bhaṇitena, bhikkhave, itthī purisaṃ bandhati; |
3. (by) speaking, monks, (a) woman {binds} man; |
ākappena, bhikkhave, itthī purisaṃ bandhati; |
4. (by) attire, monks, (a) woman {binds} man; |
vanabhaṅgena, bhikkhave, itthī purisaṃ bandhati; |
5. (by) a present, monks, (a) woman {binds} man; |
gandhena, bhikkhave, itthī purisaṃ bandhati; |
6. (by) smell, monks, (a) woman {binds} man; |
rasena, bhikkhave, itthī purisaṃ bandhati; |
7. (by) taste, monks, (a) woman {binds} man; |
phassena, bhikkhave, itthī purisaṃ bandhati. |
8. (by) touch, monks, (a) woman {binds} man; |
AN 8.18 ways a man binds a woman
same as AN 8.17 with roles reversed
MN
MN 14 higher pleasures to replace sensuality
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‘Appassādā kāmā bahudukkhā bahupāyāsā, |
4.1 Sensual pleasures give little gratification and much suffering and distress, |
ādīnavo ettha bhiyyo’ti— |
and they are all the more full of drawbacks. |
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iti cepi, mahānāma, ariyasāvakassa yathābhūtaṃ sammappaññāya sudiṭṭhaṃ hoti, |
4.2 Even though a noble disciple has clearly seen this with right wisdom, |
so ca aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehi pītisukhaṃ nādhigacchati, |
so long as they don’t achieve the rapture and bliss that are apart from sensual stimuli and unskillful qualities, |
aññaṃ vā tato santataraṃ; |
or something even more peaceful than that, |
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atha kho so neva tāva anāvaṭṭī kāmesu hoti. |
4.3 they might still return to sensual pleasures. |
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Yato ca kho, mahānāma, ariyasāvakassa ‘appassādā kāmā bahudukkhā bahupāyāsā, |
4.4 … |
ādīnavo ettha bhiyyo’ti—evametaṃ yathābhūtaṃ sammappaññāya sudiṭṭhaṃ hoti, |
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so ca aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehi |
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pītisukhaṃ adhigacchati aññaṃ |
But when they do achieve that rapture and bliss, |
vā tato santataraṃ; |
or something more peaceful than that, |
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atha kho so anāvaṭṭī kāmesu hoti. |
4.5 they will not return to sensual pleasures. |
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Mayhampi kho, mahānāma, |
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pubbeva sambodhā, |
5.1 Before my awakening— |
anabhisambuddhassa bodhisattasseva sato, |
when I was still unawakened but intent on awakening— |
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I too clearly saw with right wisdom that:
5.2‘Sensual pleasures give little gratification and much suffering and distress,
and they are all the more full of drawbacks.’ ‘appassādā kāmā bahudukkhā bahupāyāsā,
ādīnavo ettha bhiyyo’ti—evametaṃ yathābhūtaṃ sammappaññāya sudiṭṭhaṃ hoti,
5.3But so long as I didn’t achieve the rapture and bliss that are apart from sensual stimuli and unskillful qualities,
or something even more peaceful than that,
so ca aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehi pītisukhaṃ nājjhagamaṃ,
aññaṃ vā tato santataraṃ;
5.4I didn’t announce that I would not return to sensual pleasures.
atha khvāhaṃ neva tāva anāvaṭṭī kāmesu paccaññāsiṃ.
5.5But when I did achieve that rapture and bliss,
or something more peaceful than that,
Yato ca kho me,
mahānāma,
‘appassādā kāmā bahudukkhā bahupāyāsā,
ādīnavo ettha bhiyyo’ti—evametaṃ yathābhūtaṃ sammappaññāya sudiṭṭhaṃ ahosi,
so ca aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehi pītisukhaṃ ajjhagamaṃ,
aññaṃ vā tato santataraṃ;
5.6I announced that I would not return to sensual pleasures.
athāhaṃ anāvaṭṭī kāmesu paccaññāsiṃ.
MN 100 remembering first jhana as boy
28.4Stemming from that memory came the realization: Tassa mayhaṃ, bhāradvāja, satānusāri viññāṇaṃ ahosi: 28.5‘That is the path to awakening!’ ‘eseva maggo bodhāyā’ti. 29.1Then it occurred to me: Tassa mayhaṃ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: 29.2‘Why am I afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities?’ ‘kiṃ nu kho ahaṃ tassa sukhassa bhāyāmi yaṃ taṃ sukhaṃ aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehī’ti? 29.3Then it occurred to me: Tassa mayhaṃ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: 29.4‘I’m not afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities.’ ‘na kho ahaṃ tassa sukhassa bhāyāmi yaṃ taṃ sukhaṃ aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehī’ti.
30.1Then it occurred to me: Tassa mayhaṃ, bhāradvāja, etadahosi: 30.2‘I can’t achieve that pleasure with a body so excessively emaciated. Why don’t I eat some solid food, some rice and porridge?’ ‘na kho taṃ sukaraṃ sukhaṃ adhigantuṃ evaṃ adhimattakasimānaṃ pattakāyena. 30.3Yannūnāhaṃ oḷārikaṃ āhāraṃ āhāreyyaṃ odanakummāsan’ti. 30.4So I ate some solid food. So kho ahaṃ, bhāradvāja, oḷārikaṃ āhāraṃ āhāresiṃ odanakummāsaṃ.
MN 99 pīti of jhāna is not kāmehi
MN 2, 5. brāhmaṇavaggo, 9. subhasuttaṃ (MN 99.1), para. 26 ⇒
“katamā ca, māṇava, pīti aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehi? idha, māṇava, bhikkhu vivicceva kāmehi . pe . paṭhamaṃ jhānaṃ upasampajja viharati. ayampi kho, māṇava, pīti aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehi. puna caparaṃ, māṇava, bhikkhu vitakkavicārānaṃ vūpasamā . pe . dutiyaṃ jhānaṃ upasampajja viharati. ayampi kho, māṇava, pīti aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehi.
MN 85 Buddha boy realizes first jhana no reason to fear pleasure
31.3Could that be the path to awakening?’
siyā nu kho eso maggo bodhāyā’ti.
31.4Stemming from that memory came the realization: Tassa mayhaṃ, rājakumāra, satānusāri viññāṇaṃ ahosi: 31.5‘That is the path to awakening!’ ‘eseva maggo bodhāyā’ti. 32.1Then it occurred to me: Tassa mayhaṃ, rājakumāra, etadahosi: 32.2‘Why am I afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities?’ ‘kiṃ nu kho ahaṃ tassa sukhassa bhāyāmi yaṃ taṃ sukhaṃ aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehī’ti? 32.3Then it occurred to me: Tassa mayhaṃ, rājakumāra, etadahosi: 32.4‘I’m not afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities.’ ‘na kho ahaṃ tassa sukhassa bhāyāmi yaṃ taṃ sukhaṃ aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehī’ti.
MN 75 jhana even better than heavenly pleasure
10.9I see other sentient beings who are not free from sensual pleasures being consumed by craving for sensual pleasures, burning with passion for sensual pleasures, indulging in sensual pleasures. So aññe satte passāmi kāmesu avītarāge kāmataṇhāhi khajjamāne kāmapariḷāhena pariḍayhamāne kāme paṭisevante. 10.10I don’t envy them, nor do I hope to enjoy that. So tesaṃ na pihemi, na tattha abhiramāmi. 10.11Why is that? Taṃ kissa hetu? 10.12Because there is a satisfaction that is apart from sensual stimuli and unskillful qualities, Yāhayaṃ, māgaṇḍiya, rati, aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehi— 10.13and which even achieves the level of heavenly pleasure. api dibbaṃ sukhaṃ samadhigayha tiṭṭhati— 10.14Enjoying that satisfaction, I don’t envy what is inferior, nor do I hope to enjoy it. tāya ratiyā ramamāno hīnassa na pihemi, na tattha abhiramāmi.
MN 36 buddha boy recalling first jhana
same as MN 85 and 100
better to insert penis in mouth of a snake
Even when these conditions did arise, though, the Buddha did not set out a full code at once. Instead, he formulated rules one at a time in response to events. The considerations that went into formulating each rule are best illustrated by the events surrounding the formulation of the first.
Ven. Sudinna, the story goes, had strong faith in the Buddha and had ordained after receiving his parents’ grudging consent. He was their only child and, though married, was childless. His parents, fearing that the government would confiscate their property at their death if it had no heir, devised various schemes to lure Ven. Sudinna back to the lay life, but to no avail. Finally, his mother realized that he was firm in his intention to stay a bhikkhu and so asked him at least to have intercourse with his former wife so that their property would have an heir. Ven. Sudinna consented, took his wife into the forest, and had intercourse three times.
Immediately he felt remorse and eventually confessed his deed to his fellow bhikkhus. Word reached the Buddha, who called a meeting of the Community, questioned Ven. Sudinna, and gave him a rebuke. The rebuke fell into two major parts. In the first part, the Buddha reminded Ven. Sudinna of his position as a samaṇa—a monk or contemplative—and that his behavior was unworthy of his position. Also, the Buddha pointed out to him the aims of the teaching and noted that his behavior ran counter to them. The implication here was that Ven. Sudinna had not only acted inconsistently with the content of the teaching, but had also shown callous disregard for the Buddha’s compassionate aims in making the Dhamma known.
“‘Worthless man, it is unseemly, out of line, unsuitable, and unworthy of a contemplative; improper and not to be done…. Haven’t I taught the Dhamma in many ways for the sake of dispassion and not for passion; for unfettering and not for fettering; for freedom from clinging and not for clinging? Yet here, while I have taught the Dhamma for dispassion, you set your heart on passion; while I have taught the Dhamma for unfettering, you set your heart on being fettered; while I have taught the Dhamma for freedom from clinging, you set your heart on clinging.
snake ref
“‘Worthless man, haven’t I taught the Dhamma in many ways for the fading of passion, the sobering of intoxication, the subduing of thirst, the destruction of attachment, the severing of the round, the ending of craving, dispassion, cessation, unbinding? Haven’t I in many ways advocated abandoning sensual pleasures, comprehending sensual perceptions, subduing sensual thirst, destroying sensual thoughts, calming sensual fevers? Worthless man, it would be better that your penis be stuck into the mouth of a poisonous snake than into a woman’s vagina. It would be better that your penis be stuck into the mouth of a black viper than into a woman’s vagina. It would be better that your penis be stuck into a pit of burning embers, blazing and glowing, than into a woman’s vagina. Why is that? For that reason you would undergo death or death-like suffering, but you would not on that account, at the break-up of the body, after death, fall into a plane of deprivation, a bad destination, a lower realm, hell. But for this reason you would, at the break-up of the body, after death, fall into a plane of deprivation, a bad destination, a lower realm, hell….
“‘Worthless man, this neither inspires faith in the faithless nor increases the faithful. Rather, it inspires lack of faith in the faithless and wavering in some of the faithful.’”
The second part of the rebuke dealt in terms of personal qualities: those that a bhikkhu practicing discipline is to abandon, and those he is to develop.
“Then the Blessed One, having in many ways rebuked Ven. Sudinna, having spoken in dispraise of being burdensome, demanding, arrogant, discontented, entangled, and indolent; in various ways having spoken in praise of being unburdensome, undemanding, modest, content, scrupulous, austere, gracious, self-effacing, and energetic; having given a Dhamma talk on what is seemly and becoming for bhikkhus, addressed the bhikkhus.”
This was where the Buddha formulated the training rule, after first stating his reasons for doing so.
“‘In that case, bhikkhus, I will formulate a training rule for the bhikkhus with ten aims in mind: the excellence of the Community, the comfort of the Community, the curbing of the impudent, the comfort of well-behaved bhikkhus, the restraint of effluents related to the present life, the prevention of effluents related to the next life, the arousing of faith in the faithless, the increase of the faithful, the establishment of the true Dhamma, and the fostering of discipline.’”
relevant pali segment
(derived from Ven. Brahmali’s translation)
https://suttacentral.net/pli-tv-bu-vb-pj1/en/brahmali
The Master then had the Order of monks assembled and questioned Sudinna:
Atha kho bhagavā etasmiṃ nidāne etasmiṃ pakaraṇe bhikkhusaṃghaṃ sannipātāpetvā āyasmantaṃ sudinnaṃ paṭipucchi—
“Is it true, Sudinna, that you had sexual intercourse with your former wife?”
“saccaṃ kira tvaṃ, sudinna, purāṇadutiyikāya methunaṃ dhammaṃ paṭisevī”ti?
“It’s true, Master.”
“Saccaṃ, bhagavā”ti.
The Buddha rebuked him, Vigarahi buddho bhagavā— “Foolish man, it’s not suitable, it’s not proper, it’s not worthy of an ascetic, it’s not allowable, it’s not to be done.
“ananucchavikaṃ, moghapurisa, ananulomikaṃ appaṭirūpaṃ assāmaṇakaṃ akappiyaṃ akaraṇīyaṃ.
How could you go forth in such a well-proclaimed Teaching and training and not be able for life to practice the perfectly complete and pure spiritual life?
Kathañhi nāma tvaṃ, moghapurisa, evaṃ svākkhāte dhammavinaye pabbajitvā na sakkhissasi yāvajīvaṃ paripuṇṇaṃ parisuddhaṃ brahmacariyaṃ carituṃ.
Haven’t I given many teachings for the sake of dispassion, not for the sake of passion;
Nanu mayā, moghapurisa, anekapariyāyena virāgāya dhammo desito, no sarāgāya;
for the sake of freedom from bondage, not for the sake of bondage;
visaṃyogāya dhammo desito, no saṃyogāya;
for the sake of non-grasping, not for the sake of grasping?
anupādānāya dhammo desito, no saupādānāya.
When I have taught in this way, how can you be intent upon passion, bondage, and grasping?
Tattha nāma tvaṃ, moghapurisa, mayā virāgāya dhamme desite sarāgāya cetessasi, visaṃyogāya dhamme desite saṃyogāya cetessasi, anupādānāya dhamme desite saupādānāya cetessasi.
Haven’t I given many teachings for the fading away of sensual desire, Nanu mayā, moghapurisa, anekapariyāyena rāgavirāgāya dhammo desito.
for the clearing away of intoxication, for the removal of thirst, for the uprooting of attachment, for the cutting off of the round of birth and death, for the ending of craving, for fading away, for cessation, for extinguishment?
Madanimmadanāya pipāsavinayāya ālayasamugghātāya vaṭṭupacchedāya taṇhākkhayāya virāgāya nirodhāya nibbānāya dhammo desito.
Haven’t I in various ways taught the abandoning of sense pleasures, Nanu mayā, moghapurisa, anekapariyāyena kāmānaṃ pahānaṃ akkhātaṃ, the full understanding of the perception of sense pleasures, kāmasaññānaṃ pariññā akkhātā, the abolishing of thirst for sense pleasures, kāmapipāsānaṃ paṭivinayo akkhāto, the elimination of thoughts of sense pleasures, kāmavitakkānaṃ samugghāto akkhāto, the stilling of the fever of sense pleasures?
kāmapariḷāhānaṃ vūpasamo akkhāto.
Practice tip: visualize snake, with a-brahmacariya precept
One of the places I integrate this into daily practice, is when I recite the precepts and brahmacariya (“a-brahma-cariya veramanii”), I quickly visualize these similes. It’s a really powerful practice. Just like when you visualize a lemon, the saliva and acid in your mouth gets triggerred, as if you actually tasted a lemon. When there’s a powerful visualization to accompany “abrahamacariya”, it has a similar effect of associating great dukkha with sensuality. The visualization of a poisonous snake gives you fearful goosebumps, a visceral raw fear, tangible, and then the daily association of that image linked inextricably with sensual pleasures, builds a moat around your fortress, giving you one more line of defense against getting confused by subha.
👉👄🐍 penis in snake mouth similes
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Varaṃ te, mogha-purisa, |
It would be better, foolish-man, |
āsivisassa ghoravisassa mukhe aṅgajātaṃ pakkhittaṃ, |
for your penis to enter the mouth of a terrible and poisonous snake |
na tveva mātugāmassa aṅgajāte aṅgajātaṃ pakkhittaṃ. |
rather than {inserting your penis into a} woman’s vagina. |
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Varaṃ te, mogha-purisa, |
It would be better, foolish-man, |
kaṇhasappassa mukhe aṅgajātaṃ pakkhittaṃ, |
for your penis to enter the mouth of a black snake |
na tveva mātugāmassa aṅgajāte aṅgajātaṃ pakkhittaṃ. |
rather than {inserting your penis into a} woman’s vagina. |
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charcoal pit similes
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Varaṃ te, mogha-purisa, |
It would be better, foolish-man, |
aṅgārakāsuyā ādittāya sampajjalitāya sajotibhūtāya aṅgajātaṃ pakkhittaṃ, |
for your penis to enter a blazing charcoal pit |
na tveva mātugāmassa aṅgajāte aṅgajātaṃ pakkhittaṃ. |
rather than {inserting your penis into a} woman’s vagina. |
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why?
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Taṃ kissa hetu? |
Why is that? |
Tatonidānañhi, moghapurisa, maraṇaṃ vā nigaccheyya maraṇamattaṃ vā dukkhaṃ, na tveva tappaccayā kāyassa bhedā paraṃ maraṇā apāyaṃ duggatiṃ vinipātaṃ nirayaṃ upapajjeyya. |
Because for that reason, you might die or experience death-like suffering, but you wouldn’t because of that be reborn in a bad destination. |
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Itonidānañca kho, moghapurisa, kāyassa bhedā paraṃ maraṇā apāyaṃ duggatiṃ vinipātaṃ nirayaṃ upapajjeyya. |
But for this reason you might. |
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Tattha nāma tvaṃ, moghapurisa, yaṃ tvaṃ asaddhammaṃ gāmadhammaṃ vasaladhammaṃ duṭṭhullaṃ odakantikaṃ rahassaṃ dvayaṃdvayasamāpattiṃ samāpajjissasi, |
Foolish man, you have practiced what is contrary to the true Teaching, the common practice, the low practice, the coarse practice, that which ends with a wash, that which is done in private, that which is done wherever there are couples. |
bahūnaṃ kho tvaṃ, moghapurisa, akusalānaṃ dhammānaṃ ādikattā pubbaṅgamo. |
You are the forerunner, the first performer of many unwholesome things. |
This will not give rise to confidence in those without it or increase the confidence of those who have it, Netaṃ, moghapurisa, appasannānaṃ vā pasādāya, pasannānaṃ vā bhiyyobhāvāya;
but it will hinder confidence in those without it, and it will cause some with confidence to change their minds.” atha khvetaṃ, moghapurisa, appasannānañceva appasādāya, pasannānañca ekaccānaṃ aññathattāyā”ti.
There’s a good reason these are the first 5 suttas in Anguttara Nikaya
(AN 1.1)
♦ 1. Evaṃ me sutaṃ— |
(AN 1.1) Thus I heard. |
ekaṃ samayaṃ bhagavā sāvatthiyaṃ viharati |
One time the-Blessed-One, (at) Sāvatthī (he) dwelled |
jeta-vane anāthapiṇḍikassa ārāme. |
(in) Jeta’s-Grove, Anāthapiṇḍika’s Park. |
Tatra kho bhagavā |
There indeed the-Blessed-One, |
bhikkhū āmantesi: |
(to the) monks (he) addressed: |
“bhikkhavo”ti. |
“Monks.”— |
“Bhadante”ti te bhikkhū |
“Venerable sir,” those monks, |
bhagavato paccassosuṃ. |
(to) the-Blessed-One (they) responded. |
Bhagavā etad-avoca: |
The-Blessed-One {said}-this: |
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♦ “nāhaṃ, bhikkhave, |
"Not-****, *********, |
aññaṃ eka-rūpampi samanupassāmi |
another one-form {do I} see, |
yaṃ evaṃ purisassa cittaṃ |
that **** (a) man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhati |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
yatha-yidaṃ, bhikkhave, itthi-rūpaṃ. |
as-that, *********, (of a) woman's-form. |
itthi-rūpaṃ, bhikkhave, |
(A) woman's-form, *********, |
purisassa cittaṃ |
man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhatī |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
”ti. paṭhamaṃ. |
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(AN 1.2)
♦ 2. “nāhaṃ, bhikkhave, |
"Not-****, *********, |
aññaṃ eka-saddampi samanupassāmi |
another one-sound {do I} see, |
yaṃ evaṃ purisassa cittaṃ |
that **** (a) man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhati |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
yathayidaṃ, bhikkhave, itthi-saddo. |
as-that, *********, (of a) woman's-sound. |
itthi-saddo, bhikkhave, |
(A) woman's-sound, *********, |
purisassa cittaṃ |
man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhatī |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
”ti. dutiyaṃ. |
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(AN 1.3)
♦ 3. “nāhaṃ, bhikkhave, |
"Not-****, *********, |
aññaṃ eka-gandhampi samanupassāmi |
another one-scent {do I} see, |
yaṃ evaṃ purisassa cittaṃ |
that **** (a) man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhati |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
yathayidaṃ, bhikkhave, itthi-gandho. |
as-that, *********, (of a) woman's-scent. |
itthi-gandho, bhikkhave, |
(A) woman's-scent, *********, |
purisassa cittaṃ |
man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhatī |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
”ti. tatiyaṃ. |
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(AN 1.4)
♦ 4. “nāhaṃ, bhikkhave, |
"Not-****, *********, |
aññaṃ eka-rasampi samanupassāmi |
another one-taste {do I} see, |
yaṃ evaṃ purisassa cittaṃ |
that **** (a) man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhati |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
yatha-yidaṃ, bhikkhave, itthi-raso. |
as-that, *********, (of a) woman's-taste. |
itthi-raso, bhikkhave, |
(A) woman's-taste, *********, |
purisassa cittaṃ |
man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhatī |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
”ti. catutthaṃ. |
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(AN 1.5)
♦ 5. “nāhaṃ, bhikkhave, |
"Not-****, *********, |
aññaṃ eka-phoṭṭhabbampi samanupassāmi |
another one-touch {do I} see, |
yaṃ evaṃ purisassa cittaṃ |
that **** (a) man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhati |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
yatha-yidaṃ, bhikkhave, itthi-phoṭṭhabbo. |
as-that, *********, (of a) woman's-touch. |
itthi-phoṭṭhabbo, bhikkhave, |
(A) woman's-touch, *********, |
purisassa cittaṃ |
man's mind |
pariyādāya tiṭṭhatī |
(is) overpowered (by) continuously |
”ti. pañcamaṃ. |
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SN 8.4 ānanda gives a comprehensive solution in verse
SN 8.4 ānanda-suttaṃ |
SN 8.4 ānanda-discourse |
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ekaṃ samayaṃ āyasmā ānando |
One time, Venerable Ānanda, |
sāvatthiyaṃ viharati |
(at) Sāvatthī (he) dwelled, |
jeta-vane anāthapiṇḍikassa ārāme. |
(in) Jeta’s-Grove, Anāthapiṇḍika’s Park. |
atha kho āyasmā ānando |
Then ***, Venerable Ānanda, |
pubbaṇha-samayaṃ nivāsetvā |
before-noon-time, having-dressed, |
patta-cīvaram-ādāya |
(with) bowl-(and)-robe-taken, |
sāvatthiṃ piṇḍāya pāvisi |
(to) Sāvatthī (for) alms (he) entered, |
āyasmatā vaṅgīsena pacchāsamaṇena. |
(with) Venerable Vaṅgīsa [walking] behind. |
tena kho pana samayena āyasmato vaṅgīsassa |
Now at that time Venerable Vaṅgīsa |
anabhirati uppannā hoti, |
{had} dis-satisfaction arise ****, |
rāgo cittaṃ anuddhaṃseti. |
lust {degraded} (his) mind **********. |
atha kho āyasmā vaṅgīso |
Then the Venerable Vaṅgīsa, |
āyasmantaṃ ānandaṃ |
(to) Venerable Ānanda, |
gāthāya ajjhabhāsi — |
(through) verse (he) addressed: |
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verse
♦ “kāma-rāgena ḍayhāmi, |
(with) sensuality-(and)-lust (I) burn, |
cittaṃ me pari-ḍayhati. |
Mind (of) mine completely-burns. |
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♦ sādhu nibbāpanaṃ brūhi, |
[the] thorough extinguishing [please] explain, |
anu-kampāya gotamā”ti. |
Out-of-compassion, Gotama. |
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(ānanda replies)
♦ “saññāya vipariyesā, |
(your) perceptions (are) inverted, |
cittaṃ te pari-ḍayhati. |
[so the] mind (of) yours completely-burns, |
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♦ nimittaṃ pari-vajjehi, |
(the) sign (to) completely-avoid: |
subhaṃ rāg-ūpasaṃhitaṃ. |
beauty connected-with-lust |
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♦ “saṅkhāre parato passa, |
fabrications; alien (they should be) seen (as), |
dukkhato mā ca attato. |
suffering, not the self. |
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♦ nibbāpehi mahā-rāgaṃ, |
extinguish (the) great-lust, |
mā ḍayhittho punap-punaṃ. |
don’t burn again-(and)-again. |
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♦ “a-subhāya cittaṃ bhāvehi, |
Non-beautiful [perceptions] (the) mind develops, |
ekaggaṃ su-samāhitaṃ. |
unified, well-concentrated. |
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♦ sati kāya-gatā ty-atthu, |
{be} mindful (of) body-condition, |
nibbidā-bahulo bha. |
disenchantment-(in)-abundance ***. |
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♦ “a-nimittañca bhāvehi, |
Sign-less [meditation] (you) develop, |
mān-ānusaya-mujjaha. |
conceit’s-tendency,-discard. |
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♦ tato mān-ābhisamayā, |
thereupon (with) conceit-penetrated, |
upasanto carissasī”ti. |
(in) peace (you) abide. |
perception being impaired and inverted
MN 75 enjoying 5kg is like leper picking scab
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♦ 215. “seyyathāpi, māgaṇḍiya, kuṭṭhī puriso arugatto pakkagatto kimīhi khajjamāno nakhehi vaṇamukhāni vippatacchamāno aṅgārakāsuyā kāyaṃ paritāpeti. yathā yathā kho, māgaṇḍiya, asu kuṭṭhī puriso arugatto pakkagatto kimīhi khajjamāno nakhehi vaṇamukhāni vippatacchamāno aṅgārakāsuyā kāyaṃ paritāpeti tathā tathā’ssa VAR tāni vaṇamukhāni asucitarāni ceva honti duggandhatarāni ca pūtikatarāni ca, hoti ceva kāci sātamattā assādamattā — yadidaṃ vaṇamukhānaṃ kaṇḍūvanahetu; evameva kho, māgaṇḍiya, sattā kāmesu avītarāgā kāmataṇhāhi khajjamānā kāmapariḷāhena ca pariḍayhamānā kāme paṭisevanti. yathā yathā kho, māgaṇḍiya, sattā kāmesu avītarāgā kāmataṇhāhi khajjamānā kāmapariḷāhena ca pariḍayhamānā kāme paṭisevanti tathā tathā tesaṃ tesaṃ sattānaṃ kāmataṇhā ceva pavaḍḍhati, kāmapariḷāhena ca pariḍayhanti, hoti ceva sātamattā assādamattā — yadidaṃ pañcakāmaguṇe paṭicca. |
♦ 215. “Now suppose that there was a leper covered with sores & infections, devoured by worms, picking the scabs off the openings of his wounds with his nails, cauterizing his body over a pit of glowing embers. The more he cauterized his body over the pit of glowing embers, the more disgusting, foul-smelling, & putrid the openings of his wounds would become, and yet he would feel a modicum of enjoyment & satisfaction because of the itchiness of his wounds. In the same way, beings not free from passion for sensual pleasures—devoured by sensual craving, burning with sensual fever—indulge in sensual pleasures. The more they indulge in sensual pleasures, the more their sensual craving increases and the more they burn with sensual fever, and yet they feel a modicum of enjoyment & satisfaction dependent on the five strands of sensuality. |
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Don’t fall for the FIB (Fooled by Biological Imperative)
What is BI (Biological Imperative)?
In general, most of BI falls under the three F’s. Feeding, Fighting, Fornication.
One of the keys to overcoming carnal lust, passion, sensuality (desire for 5 strings of sensual pleasure), is understanding the true nature of BI.
BI is impersonal. You have roughly 75 trillion cells in your body, each cell has a life span of less than 7 years. They clone themselves, imperfectly, and billions of cells die, are cloned, and recycled and eliminated from “your” body everyday. This process is happening continuously.
On the micro (personal) level, this is happening. On the macro level, living organisms, including humans, survive by reproducing, allowing the species to survive.
Now feeding and caring for yourself, let alone a partner, offspring, family, clan, is a lot of work. Before industrialization, even the simple act of eating for survival was a monumental struggle. It’s a lot of work, a lot of suffering to survive on the micro and macro level. How did humans and other species manage to survive?
Enter BI (biological imperative). This comes in the form of pain and pleasure. Pain lets you know you’re doing something harmful to micro and macro survival. Pleasure floods your brain with addictive euphoric chemicals that pervade your whole physical body and you feel powerless to resist its addictive urges.
So how can you surmount this seemingly irrestible force?
Lots of practice, patience, diligence, and forgiving yourself for missteps. Just as one can be disciplined in eating once or day, or eating only between sunrise and solar noon time, one gradually comes to deeply understand that those physical euphoric pleasurable feelings are just BI. Don’t fall for the FIB, don’t be ruled by the biological imperative. Understand it, and put it in its proper place. You need to respond to pain to prevent harming your physical health, and to an extent you need to listen to pleasurable feelings from eating to tune in to know which foods contain nutrients you need (it changes with time and conditions depending on how you use your body).
But beyond those essential survival needs, don’t fall for the FIB. If you’re aiming for nirvana, following the precepts of celibacy/chastity/brahmacariya, you can completely ignore sexual impulses. BI that is related to sleeping and eating, you have to pay attention to, but sexual urges you can train yourself to completely ignore, they only do you harm. Treat them like you would robo calls, unsolicited advertising, spam. Incinerate immediately. If you don’t you give it potential to harm you gravely.
Invert the FIB: slave becomes master
Ajahn Chah simile of nostril
It’s the same with the senses. Sexual intercourse excites the minds of people, but it really isn’t different from sticking a finger in your nostril. Would that mean anything special to you? But worldly beings have this attachment to the other entrance; whether it is animals or humans, it has special importance to them. If it were a finger picking a nostril, they wouldn’t get excited over that. But the sight of this one inflames us. Why is this? This is where becoming is. If we don’t attach special importance to it, then it’s just the same as putting a finger in your nostril. Whatever happened inside, you wouldn’t get excited; you’d just pull out some snot and be done with it.
Right restraint
In 1979 in Barre, Massachusetts, during a question-and-answer session while on retreat, someone asked Ajahn Chah, “Is it necessarily a barrier to be in a sexual relationship? Can one not view sex in terms of it being the dance of the sacred marriage? Couldn’t it be noble and mystical?” After Ajahn Chah had the question translated, he pondered for a moment and then started picking his nose in a very graphic and extended way. When everyone was rolling on the floor laughing and he was sure they definitely got the point, he pulled his finger out of his nose: “There’s nothing more to it than that, except what the mind adds to it.” Perhaps this story has been altered a bit in the telling, but it’s still a good story.
Misc.
Brahmacariya, celibacy survival guide: it’s only as hard as you make it
https://discourse.suttacentral.net/t/brahmacariya-celibacy-survival-guide-its-only-as-hard-as-you-make-it/8989